Well there
seems to have been an upsurge in audio file output from the 'recovery
factory' in Plymouth. As if to demonstrate its internationalist
credentials the site boasts contributions from as far afield
as Los Angeles (the Venerable C) and Las Vegas (the more prosaic Bob
D) but now they have added the Sydney franchise of the Road to
Recovery to their list of credits. Their 'rep', Matt S, put in a
reasonably creditable performance (according that is to cult
standards) recounting in 'cult speak' their 'templated' version of
the AA message. What is quite remarkable (or unremarkable depending
on your point of view) is how absolutely nothing is lost in the
translation. Even from as far away as the antipodes the programme 'a
la cult' is still presented in the same bland, pre-digested fashion
as its home-grown version. We're not going to bore you with all the
details suffice to say it went something like this: “blah blah
blah sponsor … blah blah .. steps....blah blah ..home
group....blah blah sponsor... “ and so on. Well done Matt but
don't give up the day job - yet! You're not quite up to “circuit
speaker” standards but you've done your first international 'spot'
so don't give up all hope! But now we come to Pat O-S (three guesses
what the “S” stands for!). Now Pat (who hails from the less
exotic clime of Dundee – BEGINNERS BIG BOOK TUESDAY Meeting,
Chamber of Commerce Buildings, Panmure St) turned in a much more
polished performance. Pat though we think suffers somewhat from a
Scarlet Pimpernel complex as in:
They
seek him here, they seek him there
Those Frenchies seek him everywhere
Is he in heaven or is he in hell?
That demned elusive Pimpernel
Those Frenchies seek him everywhere
Is he in heaven or is he in hell?
That demned elusive Pimpernel
Quite
mysteriously he can flit into town and out again, doing a quick Step
Nine here, carrying the MESSAGE there, and all so unobtrusively!
Indeed they don't call him the Tartan Pimpernel for nothing! We must
admit our reviewer couldn't stand to listen to the whole recording
and gave up after Pat wittily referred to driving in kilometres per
hour as opposed to miles per hour, this being an indication of how
sober he now is! This speaker however has some potential and should
certainly consider a professional career in AA. He definitely has the
capacity to get bums on seats to which the loud applause that greeted
his introduction will testify! (Interestingly - or not - and purely
as an aside - one of the aacultwatch team did have to sit through a
Joys of Recovery group conscience once – but only once! At this
particular session there was a lengthy debate as to whether speakers
should be applauded or not. Here David B (Joys founder) posed the
fascinating theological question ie. Were the audience responding to
the speaker him/herself or to their Higher Power as he/she/it
expressed him/her/itself through them! At this point someone (guess
who?) mentioned rule 62 but all they got were a lot of dirty looks
for their trouble. The cult do take themselves so dreadfully,
dreadfully seriously!).
Anyway
we come now to the blockbuster – the 18th
Anniversary address given by the three “big cheeses” themselves
viz. Wayne P, Jon F and Alexis K – the “trusted servants” of
the Road to Recovery (cult) group. For reasons (mostly self evident)
Wayne's pearls of wisdom were not presented for the benefit of
posterity (and for mere mortals like the rest of us “Beano”
readers in AA) on this occasion. It might have been that his
trousers had fallen down at an awkward moment and he was unable to
reach the mike stand in time for the show! We shall probably never
know (braces work quite well though or so we've heard Wayne!) but it
was left to Jon and Alexis to plug the gap! Again we're not going to
give a blow by blow account because that really would be too cruel,
and even we are not that hard hearted or inconsiderate towards our
readers. Again it can be condensed down into: “blah blah blah
sponsor ….. blah blah blah home group.... blah blah ….. God (!!)”
Goodness! What was that? God! God got a mention at the Road to
Recovery! Is this possible? Yes indeed. It would seem that God (of
your understanding) is making something of a comeback in Plymouth.
After an extended absence the Deity is indeed the buzz word around
town again. The Supreme Being even managed as many mentions as
“sponsor” (and its variants) throughout our heroes' separate
renditions of their programme. Indeed they sounded almost reasonable
in their addresses (although Alexis K did seem to lose the plot
towards the end of his rather rambling speech). Unfortunately cult
speak was still very much to the fore with the word “passion”
used a number of times in the latter's presentation. Now in cult
circles the term “passion” is a euphemism for “thuggery” and
the last time Jon and Alexis came over all 'impassioned' was at the
AA conference. For the full gory details see here.
Now of course we might be accused of digging up the past rather in
making reference to this but then some things never change in the
Road to Recovery. For example every attempt is being made at the
moment to 'airbrush' Wayne P back to life (after that unfortunate
incident where his trousers fell down – AGAIN). It would seem
however that Wayne is not the only one who has serious problems with
his trouser's 'vertical integrity'. Indeed the rumour is going
round that yet another of the “trusted servants” is suffering
from 'kegs imbalance'. Still – no matter – it's just another
defect of character and we're quite sure that the miscreant is
praying like mad for the “shortcoming” to be removed (or should
we say for the “shorts” to be removed!). But then it's hardly a
criminal offence and you can't get NICKED for it can you? After all
– the SHOW MUST GO ON!
Cheerio
The
Fellas (Friends of Alcoholics Anonymous)
