Yes!
Finally.. it had to be done! Quite unable to resist temptation we
took ourselves off to the Sidcup Into Action website barely able to
contain our excitement for we too wished to hear the words of wisdom
issue forth from the mouth of the great seer – Tim P! True enough there he was - though perhaps a little bit dated -
with an audio file which just begged to be listened to! Hands
trembling we clicked on the link and waited breath baited for the
guru to hold forth. Well we have to be absolutely honest here. We
actually only managed about the first ten minutes or so. Very
rapidly some of the team were displaying signs of traumatic stress
disorder: glazed eyes, drooping eyelids, tongues protruding from
mouths accompanied by the frequent but sporadic twitching of the
cheek muscles followed by a slight foaming between the lips. It soon
became evident that our collective psyches were struggling to cope
with sheer amount of verbal detritus issuing forth from Tim's buccal
cavity; it was more than any mere mortal could possibly bear.
However, even from this relatively brief exposure, we managed to
deduce the substance of Tim's exposition. Firstly we were informed
that he was a RECOVERED alcoholic - TWICE - (it could even have been
more … you have to remember that the whole thing remains something
of a nightmareish blur). Not only was he RECOVERED but it would seem
that the unique nature of this truly remarkable condition had to be
further emphasised by heavily stressing each individual syllable of
the word as he uttered it - not merely RECOVERED but RE-COV-ERED! Now
at this point it is necessary to recap somewhat for those of you who
are not completely au fait with the unique hierarchical structure
that subsists in AA. Of course most of you will have heard of
'newcomers' and 'old timers', and perhaps even 'bleeding deacons' and
the like but there is yet another stratification system which is not
so widely publicised within the fellowship. Mostly the AA membership
is composed of what are known as 'alkies', or 'alcoholics' or
'ex-drunks'. These terms are not meant to be disparaging (or not at
least within the AA context) but rather serve as apt descriptions
(and reminders) of a condition which we would all be well advised not
to forget. These lowly (or is it humble?) members comprise the
majority of the membership sometimes referring to themselves as
'recovering' alcoholics thereby further emphasising the inconvenient
fact that the whole process will never ever be 'done and dusted' or
not at least until death intervenes. Unwitting fools that they are,
however, they have achieved mere abstinence from alcohol and are yet
to enjoy the full fruits of divinely inspired recovery. They must be
satisfied merely with living their lives, going to work, raising
families, helping others from time to time and all this done modestly
and without speeches or even a fanfare. Theirs is a lacklustre rather
mundane condition but then not all of us can achieve such spiritual
and lofty mastery as that enjoyed by our next category: the RECOVERED
ONES. Now these are of entirely different sphere, and almost beyond
detection by us mere mortals who reside so ignorantly within their
awesome shadow. These select few ILLUMINATI have entered the realm of
eternal bliss as they choir endlessly and relentlessly their
hallelujahs, their ecstatic mantra: “happy, joyous and free”!
Naturally this elevated condition is not to be acquired so easily.
There are certain prerequisites to its attainment which for the
benefit of the ignorant (ie. you …. and maybe us!) we include a
small selection herewith. Firstly - a thoroughgoing acquaintance with
the blessed tome ie. the Big Book (Alcoholics Anonymous), its
contents only to be revealed to the neophyte by the all knowing, all
seeing, all POWERFUL SPONSOR – he or she who it is “suggested”
(cult speak for 'must') you obey! So complex, so profound indeed are
its “suggestions” that these may only be communicated to the
novice via the offices of one fully inducted into the sacred craft.
Therefore it is vital that such a one should have an 'approved' sponsor
him/herself and thereafter onwards and upwards right up to the zenith
of this holy lineage. The 'logos' must only be communicated by those
who are full initiates in order to avoid any kind of corrupt interpretation or
misconstruction of its abstruse contents. Indeed until the sponsee is
at least able to quote chapter and verse at the drop of the hat they
cannot be considered even as eligible for further and indeed deeper
instruction in the mysteries of this esoteric text. (From time to time
a 'Master of the Book' may be observed at meetings usually carrying a
specially bound leather edition which serves to denote to others
present that they are blessed with an 'authority's' presence). However
it is insufficient merely to be conversant with the wording of the
blessed text. No indeed! One must go forth and spread the Word to
those poor heathens who comprise the remainder of the fellowship!
Thus an exacting spiritual regime is required of the fledgling
missionary (or “pigeon” as they are known in certain circles). As
to the remainder we can only make scant allusion for after all we are
not (yet) admitted to the novitiate. However we can say that one of
the “suggestions” is that the “pigeon” ring two newcomers a
day to ensure that these are directed towards and kept firmly upon
the sacred path. But already we have revealed too much and do not
wish to incur the wrath of the adepts of the Big Book.......
…..Anyway
not wishing to completely flog the horse to death we think you get
our gist! Many are called but few are chosen …...blah di blah di
blah....
Of
course the facts are the “programme” does not need any "special
interpretation" (Dr Bob's words not ours!) let alone some kind of
'expert' sounding off on the subject! Anyone with a couple of brain
cells - which would include your average 'drunk' - can pick it up,
put it into action (if they wish) and reap the rewards.
Our
advice then (for what it's worth) is: Keep It Simple, go to meetings (AA not cult) (see our Cult: Where to Finds),
don't drink and maybe apply a bit of judgement. Now how hard is
that?
Cheerio
The
Fellas (Friends of Alcoholics Anonymous)
