More extracts on AA sponsorship from contributors to the aacultwatch forum

“….... I have noticed aacultwatch has used my reply [with permission] to you to make an article on Stop Press. I think it is good that they are promoting the use of A.A. literature. If they read this then they could add the following to the list, for these also give the attitude that an A.A. sponsor ought to have:

• “AA Comes of Age” page 279:

“The member talks to the newcomer not in a spirit of power but in a spirit of humility and weakness. He does not speak of how misguided the still suffering alcoholic is; he speaks of how misguided he once was. He does not sit in judgement of another but in judgement of himself as he had been”.

• Daily Reflections page 29 “Serving my Brother”
page 148 ” Giving without strings”
page 280 “Love without strings”
page 292 “Fixing me, not you”
page 352 “Love with no price tag”
page 361 “Honesty with newcomers”

It saddens me too, to see individuals abusing this fellowship by publishing their own personalised adulterations of this simple A.A. programme for their personal gain for prestige or money; and the misleading advice and suffering this has caused to people like yourself. You mentioned “In my opinion leaving a cult is just as difficult and painful as getting sober” I can believe it is, but as with your experience with alcohol I believe that you will be able to turn this experience into your own unique strength of character to benefit not only yourself but to give hope to others. I think you are doing this already, by sharing your experience, strength and hope on this forum.

It is good to see you have got some help with a counsellor, I know from my own experience that the A.A. programme can’t necessarily help me with all my life’s problems and I have been helped by professional counselling on a few things myself. The notion that the steps are some sort of spiritual cure all and the sponsor some sort of spiritual adviser, is coming from outside influences rather than A.A. publications.

“It would be a product of false pride to claim A.A. is a cure all, even for alcoholism” (Bill W.) --As Bill Sees It page 285, Daily Reflections page 122.

I have found “Living Sober” a very helpful and I usually suggest to newcomers that they get a copy as soon as they are able to (This is AA published, available from the GSO literature order form). Chapter 23 “seeking professional help” says: “Examining “case histories” of recovered alcoholics, we can see clearly that all of us have profited, at one time or another, from the specialized services of psychiatrists, and other physicians, nurses, counsellors, social workers, lawyers, clergymen or other professional people. The basic A.A. textbook, “Alcoholics Anonymous,” specifically recommends (on page 74) seeking out such help. Fortunately, we have found no conflict between A.A. ideas and the good advice of a professional with expert understanding of alcoholism.” I just hope you get as much personal freedom to live your life as you wish from the officially published A.A. Twelve Step programme as I have. “

And........

“I think you make a good observation, the same one as the co-founders. Bill W. described it when he gave the reasons for the alcoholics splitting away from the Oxford Group. Dr. Bob learned from his experience of what did not work and observed that it was better for him to let newcomers find their own higher power in their own time and manner:

“John S. (an Akron member beginning in 1940) remembered:………“At this time,-- January 1940--- he wasn’t making you get out of bed and surrender on your knees, to pray with you. I’m not sure if that would have worked too well with me” (Dr. Bob and the Good Oldtimers, page 275-276)

“4. It was discovered that all forms of coercion, both direct and indirect, had to be dropped. We found that “checking in the hands of amateurs too often resulted in criticism, and that resulted in resentment, which is probably the most serious problem the average alcoholic is troubled with” (Bill W. “Pass It On” page 172)

“For example, drinkers would not take pressure in any form, excepting John Barleycorn himself. They always had to be led, not pushed. They would not stand for the rather aggressive evangelism of the Oxford Groups. And they would not accept the principle of “team guidance” for their own personal lives. It was too authoritarian for them. In other respects, too, we found we had to make haste slowly. When first contacted, most alcoholics just wanted to find sobriety, nothing else.” (A.A. Comes of Age page 74).”

Come on in! Have your say here!

Cheers

The Fellas (Friends of Alcoholics Anonymous)