AA Conference questions 2016 (contd)

Sundry committees and their various (proposed) deliberations

See here

Comment: Do please try and stay awake!

(nudges reader)

Cheers

The Fellas (Friends of Alcoholics Anonymous)

AA Conference questions 2016 (contd)

Committee 2 Q3 draft Chapter 12 Young Peoples Liaison Officer

Comment: Arguably the same points might be raised with regard to any demographic group – why not an Old People's Liaison Officer? Or an Unmarried Single Mother's Liaison Officer? .. And so it goes on – the progressive (or more accurately retrogressive) dissection of AA until …. well not much is left!

Cheers

The Fellas (Friends of Alcoholics Anonymous)

How NOT to run an intergroup....

…. if in fact it can be called an intergroup …...

But which intergroup you say? Plymouth (Road to Recovery cult) Intergroup of course!  A 'master class' in corruption and incompetence .....

Our correspondent writes:

"Sunday 13th December.

An harmonious joke.

The typical Roads To Recovery agenda, moaning that their report hadn't been read out by region [South West] the previous weekend, and complete denial that their group is at fault.

A little known fact that in light of the theft, region are considering suspending Plymouth Intergroup. And part of the consideration depends upon a monetary donation to region. A year or so ago, as R-T-R weren't getting their own way they decided to by-pass region and send money straight to GSO as retaliation. Of course, what was given to Intergroup Mike M, who works for the …............, was gambled away! So region have turned tables on R-T-R, basically - you want to cover it up, then we'll see!
Roads had to go thru the motions of an in depth study of Tradition 3, which I'm sure was a great use of time for all who attended.

As is also a tradition of Plymouth Intergroup, the recent "Where to find" listings are wrong. The outgoing Share and Where to find, an incompetent, semi literate Roads member - Martin S - immediately blamed the printer. Of course, that's what printers do - they take the information given, change the lay out, alter the details and spelling, then print and deliver it! Well, apparently, that's what this printer does - it could possibly be Martin's fault.
It was discussed that in the 3 years of taking on this role, that there have been continuous errors, and that as Martin S is now rotating out, maybe a new printer could be found.
Martin S assured us that anyone else is "quadruple the price".
You get what you pay for.

You get what you vote in too.

Talking of which, there are many service vacancies at Plymouth Intergroup, one of which is the Vice Chair position. A non-R-T-R member had been put forward by their home group and attended the Sunday meeting. There was much discussion …...., as usual R-T-R voiced their objections, but the shocking point was the concerns raised by the Treasurer - a member of the same home group as the Vice Chair nominee, she seemed delighted to vote against the nomination. And, as the nominee was out of the room during the discussion and voting - it was with a certain distaste that the Treasurer elected herself (not allowing the Chair) to inform the nominee of the decision not to elect them.
What followed was an onslaught of castigation by R-T-R - offering advice to the nominee, then trying to vote them into an entirely different service position. The nominee declined any further service position with exceptionally good manners and grace, yet R-T-R continued to push and chip-away - until a GSR from another non-R-T-R group objected to the R-T-R members behaviour.

It also came to light that this years Plymouth Convention made a loss.
Can you guess which group the Convention Convener comes from?
Yes, it's Roads To Recovery! Setting the convention fund on a road to bankruptcy.
A third of the usual turn-out was reported back. It was previously just below the 300 mark, this year - 97 people attended.
A great deal of money was spent on raffle prizes, £150 and it made a £30 profit.
It had previously been decided when the last Convenor, a non-R-T-R member, held the post that Intergroup funds were NOT used for buying raffle prizes, and that the convention prizes would be made from donations by members.
However, times change.
R-T-R hypocrisy doesn't.
And, now that it's predominantly a Roads To Recovery convention, and they don't like any old crap - the purchase of prizes from Intergroup funds is allowed!
It was also discussed that a committee was formed, poised and ready for action should another (loss making?) convention be approved. I've heard of closing the stable door after the horse has bolted, but I've never encountered a situation of bricking up the stable to keep the horse in the barn - until today!

All in all, another, predictable, Roads dominated, back-stabbing, loss making Intergroup meeting. Roll on February 14th, when we get to do it all again!

As always
InTheKnow”

(our edits)

Comment: Couldn't have put it better ourselves!

Cheers

The Fellas (Friends of Alcoholics Anonymous)

PS Thanks to our correspondent

AA Conference questions 2016 (contd)

For your delectation: 

Committee 1 Q3 Treatment Centre Visitors to AA Meetings Structure Handbook

Comment: Concerns have been raised before about the impact of treatment centre referrals but usually in terms of their connection with the introduction of abusive (directive) sponsorship styles which are on the increase in the fellowship (frequently conducted under the guise of so-called “tough love” ie bullying).

This particular section seems rather overly preoccupied with finances and protocol than more substantial issues. We're pretty sure that any new visitors will quickly latch onto the idea that someone's got to pay for the tea and biscuits etc … why not us? As for the “addict” label it's entirely accurate for an alcoholic to refer to themselves as an addict – that is precisely what they are. This seems something of a quibble and mostly the preoccupation of the 'pure bloods' who regard themselves as somewhat superior to your 'hybrid' members. But we all need someone to look down on don't we!

Cheers

The Fellas (Friends of Alcoholics Anonymous)

AA Conference questions 2016

Yep! It's that time of year …. again! It's a good job someone emails us to jog our memories ..... it's not exactly the highpoint of our calendar featuring as it generally does just another catalogue of statements expounding the bleeding obvious ….

So we'll kick of with “Committee 1 Q1 Article Disability and Our Primary Purpose” (the latter phrase unfortunately having been appropriated by the Dallas Primary Purpose gang et al who've attempted to turn the Big Book into some kind of AA 'bible').

By and large mostly common sense (thereby falling into the above category) although the emphasis seems primarily directed towards the hearing impaired (or is it challenged?). Clearly it always helpful for someone who's either deaf or going deaf to be able to see the person who's doing the talking. Those meetings (fortunately rare) which seem to prefer to conduct their proceedings under cover of a perpetual dusk (ie. candle light - mostly run by tree huggers and frustrated Liberal Democrats) might like to bear that in mind. But it's not all doom and GLOOM (geddit!). Sometimes – if not frequently - not being able to hear what's said in a meeting can be a positive blessing. Just imagine not having to endure some Big Book nutter holding forth (usually inaccurately) on that tome or even worse yet another cult sponsorship freak banging on incessantly about how bloody wonderful their current guru is, and how they do EVERYTHING their sponsor tells them! Every cloud indeed has a silver …..

Cheers

The Fellas (Friends of Alcoholics Anonymous)

PS Thanks again to our friend for their timely reminder

'Quick fix' recovery!

“An AA member I've known for many years went through the same organised book study [Primary Purpose/Back to Basics] some years ago but more recently he was feeling very low and had begun distancing himself from the rooms. Knowing he had gone through the 'recovered' process, and having listened for a time I asked if unrealistic expectations could have anything to do with the way he was feeling, to which there was no reply. A few days later he messaged me to tell me that he had been thinking about what I had said and had concluded that he had been carrying unrealistic expectations. He had been expecting Nirvana, he had been set up to fail.

I'm not sure if you are aware but in this region the people who go through this recruitment process which is disguised as a book study do not have a sponsor at the end of it, they are told they will not need one because they will have God in their lives. If you think about it short term sponsorship in this way also makes way for those adept at recruitment to net the next batch of naive newcomers. Those who fall for all the hype will have been primed in meetings where they will hear of the man who showed them the way, and if you want what they have you have to do what they did. Short term quick fix solutions are also very well suited to rehab clinic business model where customers take up accommodation for approximately the same length of time it would take to complete the so called book study.

Some people see that celebrity status can be brought about by going it alone, without sticking closely to the core movement. I think when this snowball was rolled there was an intention of exact replication, you will often hear that 'precise, specific, clear cut directions' are to be followed. I imagine some people can't help but promote themselves rather than the up line that showed them what to do. It seems to be what is happening locally right now with a man causing much controversy who appeared out of nowhere a couple of years ago with the recruitment formula. He incessantly promotes himself as Big book expert and successful sponsor...... Another fairly long term member was recruited recently and he has now begun posting very threatening and abusive comments on Facebook accusing the local guru of revealing his step five.

It is all very interesting and sometimes amusing but there is a serious side of it all which should not to be ignored, one man was found dead at the end of an organised book study. His temporary sponsor announced that he had died because he had not done his 'stuff'. The failures are blamed for their own plight in the same way some Capitalists justify their selfishness by adopting the idea that poor people have booked an appointment to be exactly where they are in life. There is a series of events which leads up to everything. Although AA is not responsible for the actions of its members much can be done to ensure generally agreed upon information such as sponsorship guidance reaches all AA members because right now newcomers are being taken advantage of and AA has done nothing about it that I am aware of, and that is not on.”

(edited to preserve anonymity)

Comment: AA actually does have guidelines on bullying and abuse – the problem is that these are hardly ever enforced – which kind of makes them rather pointless doesn't it!

Cheers

The Fellas (Friends of Alcoholics Anonymous)

PS We thank this AA member for their contribution

'Carrying the message' or just plain 'pyramid' selling!

We quote:

“I would like to tell you about what I think are the underlying motives for the rapid expansion of AA groups branded by many as cults. These are groups which would prefer to be known an alternative sections of AA rather than a completely separate thing in itself with an agenda of its own. Groups branded cults have been labelled as such I think because of their adherence to precise specific clear cut instructions which includes an unalterable interpretation of the Big Book program of recovery. I will need to tell you a story first, then all should become clear.

In the early 1980's I stood in a massive audience at Wembley Conference Centre in London where thousands of people were buzzing with excitement and anticipation, they had arrived to see and hear the the founder of a growing network marketing company tell his story. Most people had already signed up to become distributors, they had become business men and women who were following a precise plan to bring about wealth, health and status within their own worlds. Mark Hughes in 1980 started a company called Herbalife using network marketing concepts, this type of business is also referred to as Multi Level Marketing. We were all there to find out how such a young man had become a multi millionaire and achieved celebrity status within his own world which was now being offered to all who chose to follow and copy him. It was to be one of many audiences he had created who worshipped him all over the world as an entrepreneurial guru. I had heard so much about this mysterious genius who had transformed the lives of thousands of ordinary people beyond their wildest dreams. As he arrived on stage you would have thought we were at a Beatles gig, the crowd was very rewarding. A young handsome sun tanned Mark Hughes, who was probably only in his early thirties stood at the podium to address his fans. He began to tell the story of how he had become incredibly wealthy and helped no end of people to lose weight and lead a healthier style by consuming his health food products. Not only that he was seemingly responsible for turning thousands of ordinary people into successful entrepreneurs running their own businesses selling his products, which were expensive. He told us all how [we] had the opportunity to follow in his footsteps, to replicate what he had done with all the hassles he had endured already removed, there would be no need to acquire staff, computers or offices, all the paperwork would be easy. He wasn't just a young handsome self made millionaire bachelor selling a product, he was selling a lifestyle and a dream which had already changed the lives of many ordinary people beyond anything they could have imagined, at least that was the narrative. It was a fascinating story to hear. He had been a sales man, a fairly ordinary and unassuming person who came up with an idea for a product he said born out of the loss of his mother to an unhealthy lifestyle. He came up with the idea, talked a manufacturer into producing the goods while he focused on the selling. Apparently he started out by selling Herbalife products from the boot of his car. We were looking at a self made millionaire who oozed success and status, everyone in the audience carried with them the very same obsession for profit and for status. Here was a man prepared to show us the path he had carved out for us all to follow, everyone wanted what he seemed to have and was willing to share. As with most humble men he didn't want all the celebrity his mission had brought him, that was merely a by-product.

Personally I was not overly excited, I'd heard it all before, I was very curious as always but I would probably not have been thereat all had I not been people pleasing my parents who had taken the bait hook line and sinker, they had become consumers, and distributors, and now they were repeating the process by recruiting me and taking me to all these impressive gatherings full of hyped up people on a money making mission they could feel good about. They really believed in the products and the business plan, me I would rather spend my money on lager, the fast fix solution for all of life's problems. I had already for a while been an unsuccessful Amway distributor selling cleaning products but I couldn't bring myself to sell the plan in order to recruit, I was no sales man, I liked to live on the edge, selling stuff didn't do it for me. I also tried to sell perfume for another MLM start up company without success, I sold one bottle of perfume that I remember, someone felt sorry for me. I did not have the verbal skills or the right look necessary to become a good sales man, and that is what you volunteer to become the moment you sign up as a distributor. Amway was already an established company, probably the first truly big MLM company to appear on the global market. In time I figured out the people making the real money in the MLM game who had all in the process acquired celebrity status always seemed to have outstanding communications skills, and it seemed they were also prepared to invest large sums of money in advertising. As a functioning alcoholic all my spare money went on alcohol, I knew the main source of income these companies had came from the distributors themselves, the so called winners knew it was a numbers game, they would advertise in newspapers filling hotel board rooms conference centre with the objective of recruiting as many people/customers as possible. The idea is to show the business plan to as many people as possible, some will become consumers and some will become really good at recruiting new distributors to earn commission from. I seriously doubt too many people ever succeed in these types of businesses business using the starter packs alone, which would cost maybe £25. It was an enticing idea, where else can you start a business for such a small amount of money, and that too was a selling point. Established distributors would suggested that it was easy to rise from nothing to great wealth. My Dad being my Dad used it as justification to buy another expensive flash car, something to impress the distributors he sought to recruit.

There used to be a health food shop local to where I lived and that is where I was shown the Herbalife business plan. The owner of the shop was clearly making money from his distributors who would fill the big room above his shop to be sold products and the business plan. Another time the manager at the place I worked asked me to attend a meeting at his house but he could not say why, I'd have to find out when I got there. I was hoping for a promotion, instead I endured an hour of being shown the Amway business plan. I found it difficult to tell him I had already been an unsuccessful distributor a few years years before, that I already understood the plan, that I was not interested. He was my controller at work, he had been feeding me plenty of work so I refrained from voicing my dismay at being manipulated in such an unethical way, especially when I could have been down the pub drinking. Network marketing is a legitimised form of what used to be known as pyramid selling, which is illegal. MLM remains lawful because some of the revenue created is redistributed back into the community of distributors to certain levels or depths.

Since this era of my life Mark Hughes passed away, he was born in 1956 and he died in 2000, he was found dead from a cocktail of alcohol and drugs in his mid forties. To show you the power of network marketing concepts I will have to give you some figures. In 1980 Herbalife was founded, in 2012 Herbalife reported net sales of $4.072 billion dollars. As of 2013 the company distributes its products in 91 countries through a network of approximately 3.2 million independent distributors. Network marketing is a phenomenally powerful business concept which has a snowball effect, not something you would want to let lose in AA with nobody at the reins.

​So what is 'the plan' exactly and what does it have to do with Alcoholics Anonymous?​

It is very simple concept most of you will already have grasped, the general idea is to become wealthy and to acquire celebrity status in your own world by following a simple but extremely powerful marketing plan or model. There are precise, specific, clear cut directions to follow, which may include leaflet distribution and the odd porky pie. So first of all you are shown the business plan, and if you like what you hear you sign up and copy the process by showing the plan first of all to everyone in your small world. If you are prepared to invest in advertising, you can show it to strangers as well. What usually happens is you are invited to a meeting at someone's house or some room some place by a family member, a friend, or perhaps by your boss. They will often not disclose why they want you to come along until you arrive, distributors in search of new recruits generally come across as excited, and they can't wait to tell you why. All the brochures have pictures of big houses and expensive cars and success stories where deluded people equate the rise of wealth with the rise of happiness. Most people I expect would want to attend these meetings if only out of curiosity. Upon arrival you are instructed to sit down and listen to some really important information which will probably change your life forever, along with a room full of similarly curious people by now desperately wanting to know what it is about. At this point the person holding the meeting adopts the role of successful entrepreneur and begins to explain himself, they will come across as eager to tell you about something which happened to them which has already begun transforming their lives beyond their wildest dreams. So out comes the white board where first a single circle is drawn at the top representing the person the person at the top of the up line, yes the person drawing on the white board. They will they proceed to tell the invited guests at this rather strange party how successful in business they have become in next to no time at all, that we should all come on board while the opportunity is still in its infancy. They will speak of the two elements of the business, selling products for a commission, and the primary focus, recruiting people to sell for another type of commission. They will say that by teaching new recruits how repeat the process, who will themselves in turn repeat the process exactly as shown commission can be returned from distributors several levels deep. Over the proceeding ten minutes or so a whole bunch of circles are drawn representing newly recruited distributors, it ends up forming a large triangle where the man at the top recruits two people who in turn recruit two people and so on can end up to a lot of commission, just from recruiting two people. Imagine if you were the distributor to recruit someone like Mark Hughes! You would need never work again, and the business can be inherited by your children.

Yawn, so what does this have to do with AA?

Well in short I believe these extremely powerful marketing concepts are already at play within AA in England. Some bright spark has already unleashed this powerful force and it has now grown to a size where its presence is becoming more and more noticeable, hence the rise of aacultwatch. Worse, with MLM there is a single company which had total control over all of its its distributors, and although I think this is the underlying long term objective for those with financial objectives, anybody can now see the love and adoration of the AA world around them can be acquired merely by copying a what is a well thought out marketing process wrapped up as a spiritual remedy.

To explain further, I had all sorts of problems in AA getting sober in the early days, it took ten years before I finally put the drink down for good, and that was nearly 12 years ago, so I've been around a while, I know what did work and what did not work, for me. There was one particular group of people in AA locally who began to emerge who came across as being very well people indeed. They would share similar things, that AA had left them feeling restless irritable and discontented, which it can do. Some people do feel like that if they are seen merely as equals, it is called status anxiety, the fear of not being a somebody, it affects those who have not like myself experienced a similar environment to AA which was rooted in Christian ideology. Anyway I began to observe these people who I spotted very quickly seemed to be selling themselves a bit compared to all the other nobodies in AA, they would say things like 'stick with the winners' , which is kind of insulting for where there are winners it suggests everyone else is a loser. It became obvious they were in search of newcomers to me very quickly but not immediately, I would take something more for me to question the possibility of a product being the underlying motivation for this new and unusual behaviour spreading across the region. I was completely unaware that I was a trained ear who knew exactly what to listen out for. Anyway members who declared themselves as recovered would attend more traditional meetings, share their first and last names declaring how they were recovered from Alcoholism, and that they had found God and were in receipt of a real spiritual experience unlike the one which had kept many of them sober for years already. Initially all members of AA were targeted for recruitment, over time the focus has primarily been on newcomers. They would say how all of the promises in the Big Book of AA were coming now true and if you want what they have, you too should do what they did making it obvious that newcomers would do well to approach them after the meeting to be shown the way, if they didn't approach the newcomer first.

Eventually I sussed out the underlying methodology, it was and still is network marketing. I was at a meeting one day out of my usual area and a man who I still do look up to but not in every area approached me, I was aware he was the man everyone was talking about, he was a celebrity in their world. I had already considered asking him to be my sponsor but I did not think he would have the time as he seemed to have sponsored tons of people, all with great success, even though many were already long time sober. So when I talk about a success I mean 'recovered' members would tell us how much happier they were having been shown how to work the program, they would all rubbish their former sobriety, assuming they were long term members, and they would say they found God in the process, exactly what it says in the Big Book. So I am not talking about nasty people with bad intentions, I am talking about good people who have gotten a little bit carried away with their obsession with numbers, with profit and with status, they can't see that they are the Actors described in the Big Book. I don't think people who have spread this methodology know any different, if there is no up or down structure they just don't get it, the principle of equality within AA I mean. So some people began openly declaring that there lives had been changed beyond their wildest dreams, it sounded appealing after all I was still relapsing, but where had I heard that before? Sadly for me what they had on offer could not possibly help me, as soon as I spotted the underlying agenda I was out of there, I needed someone to listen and help me unwrap the maze in my head, I did not need business minds selling me dreams. Looking back I can see how I was having a lot of difficulty with my communications skills, I could see through people being familiar with their behaviours but I could not find anyone to just shut up and listen. Anyway I was approached and invited to come along to a debate about the Big Book, which I thought would be a great idea as there were 101 things in the Big Book I wanted to talk about. I really thought I would be attending a debate, that is what I was told, it was not true but I took the bait and turned up anyway.

So I turned up at a man's house who was clearly very successful, very likeable, very intelligent, someone I believe would pick up the phone and speak to any alcoholic in distress night or day. I was aware this was the man who had helped a lot of people because lots of people had told me so. I had considered asking him to be my sponsor anyway so it didn't bother me too much that I'd arrived at a Big Book study, not a Big Book debate. I was losing my trust in AA members having already experienced controlling behaviour beyond belief. I'm not saying I was lured their as a malicious and blatant fabrication of the truth, sometimes people chose the wrong words, I'm terrible for that myself, either way I had arrived and there was a room full of people who all did seem to know why they were there.

I couldn't figure out how a person could sponsor a dozen or more people all in one go, I'd never come across batch sponsorship before, and that was the first indicator of a marketing process. Also there was someone taking notes and we were told the only reason this person was in attendance was because he was learning how to repeat the process. The Big Book study was to be carried out over several weeks, there would be homework for us all to do every week which was designed to get you to read the Big Book and to look for certain things such as promises not listed in the promises chapter. The person running the show spoke of restlessness irritability and discontentment prior to going through this particular method of studying the book and going through the 12 steps and finding God in the process. Alcoholics were painted as an undisciplined bunch as quoted from somewhere in the book which was used as justification for us to all follow precise specific clear cut direction. By now I had realised we were being shown the plan however the reward would not come in the form of money, it would come in the form of fulfilled promises, certain keywords sentences and phrases were used to paint an interpretation which suited the underlying marketing concepts, now I wanted to know if there was money involved although initially I did not. I saw it as a religious sectarian thing where this band of people saw themselves as another arm of AA rather than how I now see it which is as a completely separate thing in itself which has brought about division and controversy, which some people enjoy.

All the ingredients were there, the up line was being promoted, I had been lured to a meeting to be shown and shown the plan, you do this, then you repeat it and as a reward you get a fourth dimension of existence as promised in the Big Book and people were being taught how to repeat the process. People were also given instructions and homework, and like most MLM meetings it was a numbers game, you can't expect to recruit everyone. I had been lured under false pretences and the process had to be strictly adhered to. We were told exactly what to highlight in the Big Book, we were not given the opportunity to debate or to make our own interpretations, we were expected to be passive learners instructed to follow instructions, to read a certain number of pages every day and to look for specific things, such as anything that seemed like a promise. There was a lot of talk about God, about how all of the promises in the Big Book had already started to come true for those who had trusted the process but for me it was a mockery, I failed to see how multi level marketing concepts could help me at all having already failed me three times. So after two weeks I walked away from it, I could not see how another six weeks or so of reading a book I had already read more than once could help me.

In time I learned that there appears to be a link between the rapid expansion of rehab clinics across the country, shareholders, and the rapid expansion of primary purpose type organised groups across the country. I am sad to see that tradition 9 is being ignored, it says 'ought never be organised' for this very reason, to stop individuals from taking control. It is in my opinion a power play, and as I have said before, AA should not underestimate the power of these marketing concepts. I do accept that most people are completely unaware that they have been used as pawns in a game of numbers. I also accept that there is no need for anger, these people are trying to help others, but they have been blinded to the damage they cause in their wake, they cannot or do not want to accept what they are doing is in opposition to AA tradition. It is affecting AA as a whole therefore in my opinion step four has been invoked.

“Each person is like an actor who wants to run the whole show; is forever trying to arrange the lights, the ballet, the scenery and the rest of the players in his own way. If his arrangements would only stay put, if only people would do as he wished, the show would be great. Everybody, including himself, would be pleased. Life would be wonderful. In trying to make these arrangements our actor may sometimes be quite virtuous. He may be kind, considerate, patient, generous; even modest and self-sacrificing. On the other hand, he may be mean, egotistical, selfish and dishonest. But, as with most humans, he is more likely to have varied traits.” [BB. Step 3]

Anonymous”

Cheers

The Fellas (Friends of Alcoholics Anonymous)

PS Our thanks for this member's contribution

'Alcoholics Anonymous saved my life, but now I’ve lost my faith'

Jon Stewart spent 14 years attending AA meetings. They got him sober, but at a cost. He asks why so few alcoholics are offered alternative treatments.

An interesting article.

See also Jon's blog: Leaving AA, staying sober: new perspectives on recovery

(note disclaimer)

Cheers

The Fellas (Friends of Alcoholics Anonymous)

PS Our thanks to those members who drew our attention to the above

News from sunny Balham (London)..... or how group consciences should NOT be conducted!

We quote: 

“The following is an account by one member, …...., of what has been going on at the Balham Wednesday 8pm meeting:

Several months ago, an AA member of long-standing started encouraging young female newcomers who were single mothers, to come with their children to the Balham 8-9pm Wednesday meeting. Some of these young mums brought babies, which wasn’t a problem, even though they were noisy, but some brought children of school age, nine or ten or older and some of the other old-time members voiced unease about the sort of material that was being shared and whether this was a wise thing for AA to be encouraging.

This was a night time meeting after all, and the children looked a bit shocked by some of the explicit content and the swearing. There was also an issue with the owners of the room, who might be cross if they found out that school age children were present in a community centre at night at what was surely presumed an adult event.

When several members voiced concern, they were told by the AA member calling for the women to be admitted with their kids - let’s call this woman Member A– that all that was needed to convert the meeting into a child friendly meeting from that evening onwards was a show of hands. The show of hands was then held and as no one apart from two older members wanted to exclude the poor girl who had been told to come with her kids that evening, the motion was passed.

The next week a member of long standing who had not been there protested that this was not on, and attempted to call a proper group conscience. ‘No no!’ Member A shouted, very forcefully. ‘We held a group conscience last week. This has all been sorted. The conscience was unanimous in favour of children.’

The other member pointed out that a quick show of hands was not a group conscience. No notice had been given, and no one had read out the traditions. If the meeting were to be changed to child friendly, with all the implications that entailed, including the agreement of the management of the building, then the proper procedures should be followed or AA’s name would be dragged into controversy. A group conscience must be called. The secretary then went about suggesting a date but when two weeks from then was settled upon, member A’s husband, let’s call him Member B, an old-timer, suddenly erupted and very angrily shouted that he would not have it because ‘it doesn’t suit me!’

After more wrangling, the secretary managed to get a group conscience arranged for three week’s time, which Member B very grudgingly agreed to. 

When the evening of the conscience came, members arrived to find the secretary of the meeting had been switched, for that night only, to a sponsee of Member B.

Member B, moreover, was ensconced at the front table next to him, poised to do the chair that week. Member A was sitting at the side of the room, flanked by all her sponsees, while Member B’s sponsees sat in the front. The meeting was packed to the rafters with people regular members had never seen before. 

There followed a very joysy chair by Member B in which he openly questioned the traditions, saying ‘personalities not principles got me sober’.

Member A and B’s sponsees all shared back what an inspiration he was.

The meeting concluded and the group conscience began…with Member A getting out a pad on which she had evidently prepared notes.

The temporary secretary, looking to her for guidance, and with her prompting him, then announced that the question of whether to admit children would now be dealt with by proposing a formal motion for and against and having a vote. He summarised ‘the issues’, as he saw them, briefly. And then proceeded to start taking the vote.

Several members objected, pointing out that no one had been called to speak. People who wanted to speak must be heard. Member A shouted that this wasn’t right. No one was allowed to speak. It had been agreed to do it this way. But three long time members insisted that that wasn’t how group consciences worked. Anyone who wanted to speak could speak. And they would have their say otherwise this wasn’t a group conscience. Reluctantly Member A conceded.

Three members spoke against turning the meeting child friendly. When one of them said he thought that if many more kids came we might have to have a room set aside and a childcare person to sit with them who was CRB checked, Member A exploded and screamed at him that he was wrong and to shut up. This member, a very courteous, well liked elderly man, was left visibly shaken and upset.

Those who spoke in favour of admitting children all made very emotive speeches about how if the vote went against kids, single mothers would drink and probably die. And so on. Those voicing caution were made to feel like they were literally pouring drink down the throats of alcoholic single mums.

The most powerful contribution was from a young guy who said he had been a child of an alcoholic who took him to meetings and it had scarred him for life.

In the end, a meaningless sounding compromise motion ‘to admit children on a case by case basis, unless someone objects on the night’ was carried by a huge margin with only three against.

What a palaver to make the situation about the same as what operates now anyway! What was it all about? Power. That’s what. And perhaps Member A attempting to recruit more and more young female potential followers to come to that meeting?

After the vote, Member A – who held no official position in the group – announced that several vacant service positions must now be filled and reeled off the names of her sponsees, proposing them for every single one. Secretary, GSR, greeting – all were filled with her sponsees on show of hands unanimously in favour.

The message was clear: the meeting was now under new management. 

Six months on, it is a very strange affair. He sits at the front, flanked by his sponsees. She sits at the side flanked by hers. She shares first, always bigging up the meeting and its superiority to other meetings; advertising the fact that there is real cafetierie coffee, and people are friendlier there, and it’s ‘stronger recovery’ than other meetings.

Her sponsees, meanwhile, share some very extreme stuff like ‘my sponsor tells me that if I don’t adopt this way of life I’ll die.’

The atmosphere is utterly cloying. This was always a wonderful, friendly, open meeting full of the usual AA chaos and the full range of sharing. Now there is no doubt that it is tightly organised and that the emphasis is on sharing ‘positively’. When you arrive it is like everyone is in on some clever private joke. If they speak to you it is with a haughty tone of being utterly superior. The vibe is very much that you are a poor little ordinary AA-er down there, scrabbling around in the mire while they are up on some wonderful plateau of super-serenity.

Worse, they are attempting the same coup at several other meetings, including Tooting ones, notably Monday night. Here again, they and their sponsees are bit by bit taking over the service positions. When a member offered to do tea the other week, she was gratefully applauded in but the next week told, to her utter humiliation, that Member B did not agree and so she would not be allowed to do it. Their aim is for total control.

When their sponsees are secretary, they even tell them not to worry about getting chairs because they will get them. They’ve asked the same people to do chairs so many times that those meetings will probably die of boredom if they don’t die of cultdom.

They attempted a coup at Springfield Sunday night but the local members resisted with vigour and won the day. She had proposed one of her sponsees for secretary, as usual, and the group just wouldn’t have it. There was a huge row and she never went again and instructed all her sponsees to boycott it – which of course normal members are delighted about.

A final point: A former sponsee of Member A’s recently contacted the author of this account. She had broken away from Member A and was so upset at the type of sponsorship she had received that she wanted to raise the alarm but didn’t know how to do it. She said she had been subject to a lot of very controlling behaviour including being told not to wear make-up or high heels, intrusive questions about her finances, and her marriage. She said Member A came to her house a lot, which doesn’t sound like your average sponsor, who tends to demand you make the running. The girl said she always had the impression she was poking around. She was angry and worried she had been pulled into a cult of some kind. She said she had been told by Member B ‘you’re in my gang now’, which she found scary. She had been told what to share, what to wear, not to talk to men, to ‘behave yourself’ - the whole lot. Luckily, this girl now has another sponsor and is delighted to find that normal AA is not like that. Let’s hope everyone else works it out too...”

(edits to preserve anonymity)

Comment: None needed other than to say this represents typical cult behaviour

Cheers

The Fellas (Friends of Alcoholics Anonymous)

PS Our thanks to the member who sent this info to us

See also:

Plymouth (cult) Intergroup corruption 

For AA Minority Report 2013 click here