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Extracts:
“…....When I read all of …..
writings, they compel me to remember that I cannot be a good
sponsor by attacking and shaming my sponsee. I cannot be a good
sponsor by accusing and belittling my sponsee in ways that further
overwhelm that poor person with an even greater sense of crippling
guilt. Above all, if I start trying to "play God" with the
person I am sponsoring, I will end up dooming my own soul.”
“So in the case of the question "what are AA sponsors supposed to do," what I have wanted to see for a long time, is a collection of case studies of how AA sponsors actually did their job at different points in AA history, including such cases as:
(1) What Ebby actually did with Bill W. at the beginning, giving the concrete details.
(2) What Father Ed Dowling actually did with Bill W. (using the book by Robert Fitzgerald S.J., The Soul of Sponsorship: The Friendship of Fr. Ed Dowling, S.J. and Bill Wilson in Letters, for the concrete details).
(3) Concrete, specific details from the book Dr. Bob and the Good Oldtimers, of how Dr. Bob (and Anne Smith) actually worked with specific newcomers.
(4) Does Mitchell K's book on Clarence Snyder have enough concrete information on how Clarence sponsored newcomers, to write anything useful on this particular topic?
(5) Father Ralph Pfau's autobiography, Prodigal Shepherd, has lots of concrete detail about the things which Doherty Sheerin in Indianapolis did in sponsoring him. A lot of knowledgeable people back at that time regarded Dohr [sic] as being up there with Dr. Bob in terms of knowing how to sponsor alcoholics effectively and teach them real spirituality. He taught them by his own personal example -- not by preaching or haranguing them, or accusing them of worshiping door knobs and other such belittling techniques, which past a certain point are only ways to try to beef up our own very weak egos). Very few AA people are going to be able to rise to Dohr's level, but we still need examples of extraordinary virtue to point us in the direction in which we need to make personal progress.”
“..... But paradoxically, a sponsor can only become a "God-bearer" and become "transparent to God" by speaking with ruthless honesty about all his or her own shortcomings and failings, and the difficulties he or she meets in actually living the principles of the program. The minute sponsors start going on an ego trip and start trying to "play God" in too much of a presumptuously self-important kind of way, they cease to have any major value as spokesmen for God.”
“So in the case of the question "what are AA sponsors supposed to do," what I have wanted to see for a long time, is a collection of case studies of how AA sponsors actually did their job at different points in AA history, including such cases as:
(1) What Ebby actually did with Bill W. at the beginning, giving the concrete details.
(2) What Father Ed Dowling actually did with Bill W. (using the book by Robert Fitzgerald S.J., The Soul of Sponsorship: The Friendship of Fr. Ed Dowling, S.J. and Bill Wilson in Letters, for the concrete details).
(3) Concrete, specific details from the book Dr. Bob and the Good Oldtimers, of how Dr. Bob (and Anne Smith) actually worked with specific newcomers.
(4) Does Mitchell K's book on Clarence Snyder have enough concrete information on how Clarence sponsored newcomers, to write anything useful on this particular topic?
(5) Father Ralph Pfau's autobiography, Prodigal Shepherd, has lots of concrete detail about the things which Doherty Sheerin in Indianapolis did in sponsoring him. A lot of knowledgeable people back at that time regarded Dohr [sic] as being up there with Dr. Bob in terms of knowing how to sponsor alcoholics effectively and teach them real spirituality. He taught them by his own personal example -- not by preaching or haranguing them, or accusing them of worshiping door knobs and other such belittling techniques, which past a certain point are only ways to try to beef up our own very weak egos). Very few AA people are going to be able to rise to Dohr's level, but we still need examples of extraordinary virtue to point us in the direction in which we need to make personal progress.”
“..... But paradoxically, a sponsor can only become a "God-bearer" and become "transparent to God" by speaking with ruthless honesty about all his or her own shortcomings and failings, and the difficulties he or she meets in actually living the principles of the program. The minute sponsors start going on an ego trip and start trying to "play God" in too much of a presumptuously self-important kind of way, they cease to have any major value as spokesmen for God.”
(our emphases)
Cheerio
The Fellas (Friends
of Alcoholics Anonymous)
