Drunk with power: Inside a rogue Syracuse AA group

Comment: This group exemplifies the kind of conduct characteristic of a cult (although standing at the more extreme end of the spectrum). However plenty of other examples can be found within AA where groups are personality driven (usually by individuals exhibiting narcissistic traits), micro-managed and displaying exploitative and abusive conduct mostly directed at newcomers. Such conduct (and groups) should not be tolerated

Cheerio

The Fellas (Friends of Alcoholics Anonymous)

"Someone or other" and “The Sponsorship Group”

From time to time we receive emails from people complaining about the site and the fact that: 1) they have been mentioned (although we tend to stick to the traditional first name plus initial or their nick name or even one we have assigned to them ourselves eg. The Venerable C – which “Honourable Member” incidentally is about to grace the Bristol Reunion with his august presence – but more on that later!); 2) their group has been alluded to; 3) the name of their cat has been misspelt etc, and, thereafter (and occasionally), flourishing the “(L)ibel ” word at us or even the “(D)efamation)” word, and, finally (and most recently), the “(S)lander” tag. However - and for the very first time - the "S" word has been waved in our direction and this without the person (or his group) even being mentioned on our site (until now that is!).

See the following interchange of mails:

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“From: Jim B***
Subject: Slanderous statements on your blog
To: "aa_cultwatch.......
Date: Tuesday, 23 August, 2011, 21:33


Please remove all references to me and the alcoholics anonymous group i attend that have been posted on your site.

All references to: "Jim B***" or "Jim B." And "The Sponsorship Group"

They are not true.

These statements have caused me irreparable financial harm.

Yours truly,

Jim B***

908-***-****

On Aug 23, 2011, at 5:54 PM, aa cultwatch wrote:

Well the only reference we can find in the section to which you refer to a Jim B is to someone who is dead? Perhaps you'd care to elucidate

From: Jim B***

Subject: Re: Slanderous statements on your blog

To: "aa cultwatch"
Date: Tuesday, 23 August, 2011, 23:07

I am alive and well.

Jim B***

908-***-****

From: aa cultwatch

Subject: Re: Slanderous statements on your blog
To: "Jim B****”
Date: Wednesday, 24 August, 2011, 6:16

We repeat. The only references on our site are to a Jim B who was a contemporary of Bill W. However we have done a search of your name and the Sponsorship group and the results do incline us to further investigation.”

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(our edits)

….. which of course we did. It seems there DOES exist a Jim B and he IS associated with something called the Sponsorship Group based in Chatham, New Jersey (Sunday nights 8:30pm, Chatham, NJ, at the Presbyterian church on Southern Boulevard), and, by and large (or so we discovered), the comments on the net are hardly flattering concerning this operation (some references to “Midtown” cropped up – hardly a recommendation!). Moreover (and perhaps not so coincidentally) we received an email shortly thereafter (from another source) which went into some detail on the activities of this group, and for all of which the expression “hardly flattering” would be something of an understatement! Of course we're always willing to be corrected on an error and it may well be that Jim B might in fact be quite entitled to be outraged by our previously non-existent “slanderous” comments. However you will note that we have not asserted that any of this is true – simply that we have received some rather odd emails from the Chatham New Jersey area concerning Jim B and the Sponsorship Group (or maybe someone does have a guilty conscience?).

Cheerio

The Fellas (Friends of Alcoholics Anonymous)

(our thanks to our reporters in the US)

Leaving the cult

“I FEEL COMPELLED TO SHARE MY EXPERIENCE AND POINTERS THAT I THINK MIGHT BE HELPFUL TO MEMBERS WHO ARE IN JOYS OR ANOTHER CULT-LIKE GROUP TO SHARE MY EXPERIENCE AS WELL AS WHAT I WISH I WOULD HAVE DONE DIFFERENTLY UPON LEAVING THE CULT.

I didn’t quite realize how traumatic and painful it would be leaving a recovery cult. I reached out to former Joys [Joys of Recovery] members for support and guidance. I was in school at the time when all this drama began with the cult and unfortunately I decided to drop out of school. It was difficult to study and concentrate after all that was going on but still I wish that I would have continued showing up in class because in hindsight I could have used the human interaction. I realized that when leaving a cult it's very isolating so I would suggest to put yourself in structured environments such as a job or thing where you can be around people. I had to learn to socialize again. Also leaving a cult leaves a significant void in one's social life. Also when I was first having problems with Joys I felt very ashamed. I thought and believed everything that was going on was my fault and I was the bad one. So I was much too ashamed to reach out to others in mainstream AA at first. I was being shunned by the group and I got pretty isolated and I wanted to self destruct as a result. I was having intense thoughts of relapsing. It was truly thanks to a merciful higher power that I didn’t relapse; although many must have thought I did. I was behaving very alcoholic and even having problems at work. I rationalized instead of picking up booze I would eat. I weighed 130 lbs and wore size 2-4 clothes. Within 6 months I weighed 220 and wore size 18 because all I did was binge on doughnuts from the corner store and sleep and in between that I started educating myself about cults. I was still attending the meeting at this point.

In hindsight I wish that as soon as I realized I was no longer in good standing with the cult I wish I would have stopped attending the meetings and dropped service positions. The reason I think that would have been best is because the cult meetings tend to have this very subtle way of tearing up any one who disagrees with them in their shares as well as treating them very poorly. Quite naturally this creates a lot of resentment in the alcoholic who is being used as the scapegoat by the cult and resentments are deadly. As a matter of fact while all this was going on I was still doing my daily’s and writing my 10th step and taking a half hour to meditate, but there were more resentments coming at me ( I had an entire group of people abusing me) than I could handle and process even with all the tools, which is another reason while I believe it's best to get as far away from these nut jobs as possible. After a couple of months of all this abuse I did quit all the tools. I could barely get out of bed. I believe this could have been avoided had I just gotten away and not let myself get so damn isolated and asked for help and opened up to people about what was going on. I used what little thinking capability and judgement ability I had to survive this experience. My perceptions and judgement calls as well as my world view had all been altered by the cult and without them TELLING ME HOW TO THINK about stuff I was quite a mess. However I did know enough at that point to stay the hell away from my family who are all active alcoholics and drug users. It really upset me that my cult sponsor was telling me to go around my family esp. my mom (who drinks) who is the person least supportive of my recovery. I felt like she was trying to cause me to relapse (and so was the rest of the cult) to make an example. This particular suggestion could have been deadly because I was extremely used to and very much in the habit of following any order my sponsor dished out on me without questioning or thinking about it. That’s frightening because some of her suggestions were dangerous. THANK GOD I didn’t listen. I think it is very critical and important who you put yourself around after leaving the cult for more reasons than I have time to list.

I still didn’t tell my family what was going on I had a lot of fears programmed in to me by the cult about the outside world. In hindsight I wish I wouldn’t have started bingeing on food because it's been pure hell, I developed a bad food compulsion and it's very difficult to get back to good food habits again. Instead I wish I would have just swallowed my damn pride and opened up to mainstream AA members for help.”

(our thanks to this US member for their insightful contribution)

The Fellas (Friends of Alcoholics Anonymous)

So where is the 7th Cavalry!!

We recently received a most disturbing communication from a member concerning Alcoholics Anonymous in the Los Angeles area (US). A whole catalogue of incidents were detailed (in some cases including dates and locations) which in some way related to the conduct of AA members, and most of which would fall into the category of serious criminal acts (including murder and rape). Evidently such cases should always be reported to the appropriate authorities in the first instance so that an investigation might ensue, arrests be made, and, where the evidence allows, prosecutions follow. From our point of view, and where this conduct is proven, such behaviour is utterly repugnant in any context, but when it is associated with AA it has the further impact of bringing us into disrepute thereby undermining our reputation as being a place of security for those who come to us for assistance. Our reporter identified the measures they and others had taken to tackle these serious issues which included notifying the General Service Office in New York as well as the local service structures. It would seem that the responses they received were less than satisfactory. To their credit they have themselves been active in seeking to raise the profile of this situation as well as taking practical steps to ensure that newcomers to our fellowship are protected. Clearly this chimes with aacultwatch's own efforts in this area (although to date we have no evidence that this degree of criminality is associated with any particular cult group in Great Britain). However we would take this opportunity to remind you of the Midtown groups (again the US – and which present an unmistakeable cult profile) where the local service structure failed largely to deal with the problem (and as far as we are aware continue to remain inactive when dealing with these rogue elements). Our reporter identifies a number of factors contributing to this state of affairs which we paraphrase below:

1) A poorly co-ordinated local service structure with insufficient GSR representation to ensure that such anti-social conduct is reported, exposed and then dealt with ie. a lack of transparency and accountability.
2) The court referral system where – and especially in the US – individuals are required to attend AA meetings as part of their sentencing. This results, in some instances, in completely inappropriate referrals being made (ie. individuals who are not alcoholics at all (using any generally accepted definition of the condition)) and/or are unwilling participants and therefore entirely hostile towards AA and engage thereafter in anti-social behaviour causing disruption to AA meetings ie. AA is being used as an inexpensive “dumping ground” by the court system. We have argued elsewhere that the “chit” system leaves itself wide open to abuse and moreover our participation in this form of sentencing is a breach of our own traditions.
3) The failure of the AA collectively - nationally and internationally – and through its respective conferences – to address these issues. The GB conference has issued a set of guidelines in relation to “bullying” within meetings but these are only effective insofar as members and groups are willing to enforce them.
4) Sexual predation specifically is widely reported in the above communication (or 13 stepping as it is referred to within the fellowship). We are not talking here about “boy meets girl and falls in love” (and other variations on this) or even – more commonly - “boy meets girl and falls in lust” but rather a deliberate and serial targetting of vulnerable AA members by “predators” (of both sexes). Even the term “13 Stepping” has in our view the effect of trivialising what in some instances might otherwise be termed “constructive rape”.

We would argue that with reference to the above the single common factor which determines whether this conduct continues or is eliminated (or at least minimised) is whether AA members, acting singly or in groups, are willing to take responsibility for ensuring that every new person coming to our fellowship is not subjected to any form of abuse whatsoever. Too frequently we hear people complaining “Why doesn't York do something?” (in the case of Great Britain), or “Why doesn't intergroup do something?” The fact is that these elements of the service structure can do no more than offer guidance; they have absolutely no powers of enforcement. We would emphasise here that the AA pledge should not be taken as a mere form of words; it means what it says: “I am responsible” - it does NOT say: “Someone else is responsible”. We would urge members to act where any such abuse is going on. In the case of criminal activity this should ALWAYS be reported to the police and as soon as possible (incidentally there exists a legal obligation to do so). In other situations of a non-criminal nature sexual predators, bullies (cult or otherwise) etc may simply be outed. Expose them for what they are. Do NOT collude with them or give them space to continue with their abuse both of members and of the fellowship. Their actions are depriving newcomers of the right to recover and to live free of this deadly disease. Finally: there is NO 7th Cavalry to come to the rescue at the last minute – only you!

Cheerio

The Fellas (Friends of Alcoholics Anonymous)