Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions (contd)

aacultwatch's perspective on:

The AA (General Service conference approved) book:

“Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions: A co-founder of Alcoholics Anonymous tells how members recover and how the society functions”

(an almost as wildly discursive commentary as our 'take' on the Big Book)

This tome is much reviled in cult circles (especially amongst the Big Book nutters who regard it as almost heretical! (A point of interest: if you're looking for meetings largely free of the aforementioned 'fruitcakes', and for that matter sundry other screwballs, then a Twelve Step meeting following the format of the above text is usually a safe bet). The text we will be using is as indicated above. And now we come to:

Step Three (pp. 37-41)

“Step Three

“Made a decision to turn our will and our lives over to the care of God as we understood Him.” [You will note this step does NOT say: “...turn our will and our lives over to the care of our sponsor! In this connection we refer you to AA, Chapter 5, How It Works, p. 60: “ (b) That probably no human power could have relieved our alcoholism.”]

“........Therefore, we who are alcoholics can consider ourselves fortunate indeed. Each of us has had his own near-fatal encounter with the juggernaut of self-will, and has suffered enough under its weight to be willing to look for something better. So it is by circumstance rather than by any virtue that we have been driven to A.A., have admitted defeat, have acquired the rudiments of faith, and now want to make a decision to turn our will and our lives over to a Higher Power [but NOT a sponsor].

We realize that the word “dependence” is as distasteful to many psychiatrists and psychologists as it is to alcoholics. Like our professional friends, we, too, are aware that there are wrong forms of dependence. We have experienced many of them. No adult man or woman, for example, should be in too much emotional dependence upon a parent [or sponsor – yeah we are rather labouring the point – but then sometimes you have to!]. They should have been weaned long before, and if they have not been, they should wake up to the fact. This very form of faulty dependence has caused many a rebellious alcoholic to conclude that dependence of any sort must be intolerably damaging. But dependence upon an A.A. group or upon a Higher Power [ie. not on ONE individual] hasn’t produced any baleful results.

When World War II broke out, this spiritual principle had its first major test. A.A.’s entered the services and were scattered all over the world. Would they be able to take discipline, stand up under fire, and endure the monotony and misery of war? Would the kind of dependence they had learned in A.A. carry them through? Well, it did. They had even fewer alcoholic lapses or emotional binges than A.A.’s safe at home did. They were just as capable of endurance and valour as any other soldiers. Whether in Alaska or on the Salerno beachhead, their dependence upon a Higher Power worked. And far from being a weakness, this dependence was their chief source of strength.

So how, exactly, can the willing person continue to turn his will and his life over to the Higher Power? He made a beginning, we have seen, when he commenced to rely upon A.A. [the fellowship, the programme and its principles] for the solution of his alcohol problem. By now, though, the chances are that he has become convinced that he has more problems than alcohol, and that some of these refuse to be solved by all the sheer personal determination and courage he can muster. They simply will not budge; they make him desperately unhappy and threaten his new-found sobriety. Our friend is still victimized by remorse and guilt when he thinks of yesterday. Bitterness still overpowers him when he broods upon those he still envies or hates. His financial insecurity worries him sick, and panic takes over when he thinks of all the bridges to safety that alcohol burned behind him. And how shall he ever straighten out that awful jam that cost him the affection of his family and separated him from them? His lone courage and unaided will cannot do it. Surely he must now depend upon Somebody or Something else [note the capital 'S' in each case].

At first that “somebody” is likely to be his closest A.A. friend. He relies upon the assurance that his many troubles, now made more acute because he cannot use alcohol to kill the pain, can be solved, too. Of course the sponsor [or alternatively “his closest A.A. friend”] points out that our friend’s life is still unmanageable [or perhaps not – maybe he/she's just experiencing life 'in the raw' so to speak] even though he is sober, that after all, only a bare start on A.A.’s program has been made. More sobriety brought about by the admission of alcoholism and by attendance at a few meetings is very good indeed, but it is bound to be a far cry from permanent [no such thing – phenomena by their nature are ALL impermanent eg. 'temporary sponsorship' – ALL sponsors are temporary – and certainly unnecessary, if not a hindrance, in their cult 'manifestation'] sobriety and a contented, useful life [as defined by each individual – one man's contentment is another's hell!]. That is just where the remaining Steps of the A.A. program come in. Nothing short of continuous action upon these as a way of life can bring the much-desired result [or alternatively, according to an individual's tastes, any other 'program' which might bring about similar outcomes eg. religion, secular philosophy, healthy introspection, counselling, meditative practices, and a whole myriad of altruistic activities].

Then it is explained that other Steps of the A.A. program can be practised with success only when Step Three is given a determined and persistent trial [ie. a merely ritualistic approach is not going to work. Getting on your knees and reciting some kind of meaningless incantation is not going to achieve anything]. This statement may surprise newcomers who have experienced nothing but constant deflation and a growing conviction that human will is of no value whatever. They have become persuaded, and rightly so, that many problems besides alcohol will not yield to a headlong assault powered by the individual alone. But now it appears that there are certain things [in fact there are a whole host of things] which only the individual can do. All by himself, and in the light of his own circumstances, he needs to develop the quality of willingness [ie. make his or her own decisions, and not constantly under the direction of some 'control freak']. When he acquires willingness, he is the only one who can make the decision to exert himself. Trying to do this is an act of his own will. All of the Twelve Steps require sustained and personal exertion to conform to their principles [not someone else's] and so, we trust, to God’s [Higher Power, principle etc or your understanding] will.

It is when we try to make our will conform with God’s [again NOT your sponsor's!] that we begin to use it rightly. To all of us, this was a most wonderful revelation. Our whole trouble had been the misuse of willpower [take note all control freaks]. We had tried to bombard our problems with it instead of attempting to bring it into agreement with God’s intention for us. To make this increasingly possible is the purpose of A.A.’s Twelve Steps, and Step Three opens the door.

Once we have come into agreement with these ideas, it is really easy to begin the practice of Step Three. In all times of emotional disturbance or indecision, we can pause, ask for quiet, and in the stillness simply say: “God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, courage to change the things I can, and wisdom to know the difference. Thy will, not mine, be done [or alternatively any other kind of recitation which fits the bill].”””

(our emphases)(our observations in red print)

Coming next – Step Four

Cheers

The Fellas (Friends of Alcoholics Anonymous)