What a word is 'schmuck'! How much meaning is so mellifluously even onomatopoeically conveyed in that one (or is it two?) short syllable ….. ssschhhmmuuck! How evocative is the collision of the softened sibilant with the staccato conclusion intimating a confluence of sheer stupidity with utter contempt.
But we
must abandon our aural appreciation here and turn to a more mundane
but no less important consideration of its meaning, and even
manifestation.
Schmuck -
a stupid, contemptible person. An oaf. A Yiddish word meaning
'penis'. In this context: a 'prick'. A dull, stupid, fatuous person.
An ass, fool, idiot, imbecile, jackass, mooncalf, moron, nincompoop,
ninny, nitwit, simple, simpleton, softhead, tomfool...... (pause for
breath) …... cretin, ding-dong, dip, goof, jerk, nerd, schmo,
turkey.
See
'schmuck'
By now
we're certain you must be quite intrigued as to what these creatures
might look like? Surely theirs must be a degraded existence, their
vacuity expressed in every moral lineament? For your instruction if
not edification, and as an introduction, we present merely the
precursory stages tending towards this awful affliction. To go
further we fear would endanger your very souls, a venture we would
not even dare to contemplate!
Firstly:
our mystery, trainee 'schmuck' (1st
Dan)
In this
instance you will observe the narcissistic traits nearly fully
expressed: a 'selfie' layered with the Vatican Flag (a hint of
grandiosity perhaps)! Not quite an imbecile but well on the way!
A third
Dan 'schmuck' (but cut off in his prime):
David B (on the right) with our
mystery, trainee 'schmuck'
Here you
will note the 'happy, joyous and free' rictus
grins which mimic smiles but are merely overlays presented to the
world to obscure a near complete moral bankruptcy
A fifth
Dan 'schmuck' (on the phone). A very VERY
VERY IMPORTANT
SCHMUCK!:
Clancy
(on the left) accompanied again by our very own grinning moron!
A hopeless
case well beyond any possibility of redemption! But you'll note that
our trainee 'schmuck' has been working hard on his smile. And if he
had a tail he'd be wagging that too! Bless! You almost feel sorry
for the poor.....schmuck! …... Nah! Not really!
Down boy!
Down!
Cheers
The Fellas
(Friends of Alcoholics Anonymous …...
)
)
PS What do
you call a collection
of 'schmucks'? A 'gaggle', a 'bellowing' or even a 'murder'
(sometimes feels like it!)? No..... the correct denomination for a
collection of 'schmucks' is a “Road to Recovery'.
PPS
Anyone guessing the identity of our mystery 'schmuck' send in your
answer and you'll receive from us a great big …... SMILE!
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