AA's revolving door! In ...... and then out again! By the hundreds of thousands!

Extracts from the aacultwatch forum (old)

"Hi ….......

I'm impressed that the meeting has gone off the official list. well done for flagging it. I think you’re definitely not imagining things.  Bill W. called this type of ‘tough love- do as I say, believe as I believe, do it my way or else..’ type of sponsorship as “rank aggression in the name of spirituality” in his April 1961 AA Grapevine article. He Implied this “rank aggression” may have been partly responsible for turning away some of the (in his estimate) “maybe half a million” who had walked into AA and then back out in the first 25 years. At the time of writing the article the total AA membership was estimated to number 300,000. So during the first 25 years, according to Bill W., maybe another 500,000 more  had walked out. Dr. Bob also wrote an article in 1944 “On Cultivating Tolerance” in which he observed  those who had earnestly worked the steps also acquired a greater degree of tolerance of other's beliefs. He implied without tolerance we can become “smug and superior” and have a “patronizing attitude” that these attitudes are not helpful to others that we are trying to help. One of the by-products of tolerance he described as “a greater freedom from a tendency to cling to preconceived ideas and stubbornly adhered-to opinions.”

I’ll post Bill W’s and Dr. Bob’s AA Grapevine articles in the “I heard it through the Grapevine" thread on this forum. Bill W’s article is also published in “The Language of the Heart” pages 251-254, under the the title “God As We Understand Him: The Dilemma of No Faith.”If you haven't already done so, I suggest you buy the book ‘The Language of the Heart’ which contains most of Bill W’s AA Grapevine articles from 1944-1970. Dr. Bob’s article “On Cultivating Tolerance” is published in ‘Dr. Bob and the good Old Timers page 273.

I thought you might find it helpful to read some extracts from AA literature about sponsorship. These are quoted in the AA minority report 2013, section Seven, titled “AA Sponsorship the antithesis to ‘Big Book’ sponsorship” (pages 34-37). The AA Minority Report 2013 can be found on the link at the top of the aacultwatch blog. These pages will also point you to other AA literature on sponsorship. There ought to be no pressure applied in sponsorship. This is summed up perhaps best I think in these pieces by Bill W: 

“For example The Twelve Steps are not crammed down anybody’s throat. They are not sustained by any human authority.” (“Rules Dangerous but Unity Vital” AA Grapevine September 1945, The Language of the Heart page 8) 

“It is tradition among us that the individual has the unlimited right to his own opinion on any subject under the sun. He is compelled to agree with no one; if he likes he can disagree with everyone. And indeed, when on a ‘dry bender,’ many AAs do.” (“Comments on the Wylie Ideas” AA Grapevine September 1944. Language of the Heart page 98) 

“Newcomers are approaching AA at the rate of tens of thousands yearly. They represent almost every belief and attitude imaginable. We have atheists and agnostics. We have people of nearly every race, culture and religion. In AA we are supposed to be bound together in the kinship of a common suffering. Consequently, the full individual liberty to practice any creed or principle or therapy whatever should be a first consideration for us all. Let us not, therefore, pressure anyone with our individual or even our collective views. Let us instead accord each other the respect and love that is due to every human being as he tries to make his way toward the light. Let us always try to be inclusive rather than exclusive; let us remember that each alcoholic among us is a member of AA, so long as he or she so declares.” (From “Responsibility is Our Theme” AA Grapevine July 1965, The Language of the Heart page 333)

In answer to your question: “Do you think I could raise my concerns in a fellowship share, without of course referring to my ex sponsor by name.” Yes you can, it is your experience of recovery, in AA we share our experience strength and hope. You can do this in your sharing at meetings, and maybe even better, you are entitled to call for a group conscience to specifically discuss your concern. During the group conscience you could ask for the matter to to be raised at intergroup by the group's GSR, (This subject to whether the majority of the group think it a good idea; or the GSR can raise the matter at intergroup on his/her own conscience); perhaps suggest a intergroup workshop on sponsorship. It is OK to constructively criticise by raising concerns. This is pointed out in Concept IX (especially the section “Leadership in AA: Ever a Vital Need” ) and in Concept V, the "Right of Appeal" for the redress of personal grievances. “Our Critics can be our Benefactors” was written by Bill W. in the April 1963 AA Grapevine (The Language of the Heart p 345). Though, as a newcomer be aware that with an emotional age stuck in the terrible twos, some alcoholics don’t like being criticised, so if you do criticise constructively, you can sometimes expect a few of what Bill W. called "our destructive critics"to direct their wrath at yourself in return. As Bill W.  described in Concept IX: “They pitch gobs of rumors, gossip and general scuttle-butt to gain their ends - all for the good of AA of course!" So be prepared, in my experience some of it can be malicious, but all hot air in the end. I think as newcomer you’ll need to gauge the general feeling in your locality. I suggest you not stick your neck out too much, unless you know you have a reasonable amount of support, otherwise you might find yourself feeling isolated.

Another good way to air your concerns is to write them in articles to Share Magazine. You can also do this in AA Grapevine (The International journal for Alcoholics Anonymous) and the AA Grapevine “What’s On Your Mind Forum” (I’m not sure if you need to subscribe to AA Grapevine to post on the forum or not, but you could contact AA Grapevine to find out. This sort of thing is very much the topic of conversation on the forums. I’d have a look at the AA Grapevine "Whats's On Your Mind forum", "New to AA” section first. I think I have seen newcomers having similar experiences to yourself.

If you would like air your views in Share Magazine, here’s the link to write articles to Share Magazine: http://www.alcoholics-anonymous.org.uk/newcomers/index.cfm?PageID=82&MagazineID=47&TabID=3 

Link to AA Grapevine “What’s On Your Mind forum” http://www.aagrapevine.org/forums/i-say-forum 

Link to AA Grapevine http://www.aagrapevine.org/ 

I agree with you entirely when you said “I believe we have a duty of care to protect the most vulnerable, and that means mainstream AA reaching out to the most vulnerable in the same way these extremists do.” This duty of care is a principle that runs throughout the Concepts, Traditions and guidelines.

Concept XII, Warranty Six: “..that care will be observed to respect and protect all minorities; that no action should ever be personally punitive;” and “…that our conference will be ever prudently be on guard against tyrannies great and small, whether these be found in the majority or in the minority.”

Concepts V, IX and XII can be found online in the AA Service Manual Combined with the Twelve Concepts for World Service  http://www.aa.org/pdf/products/en_bm-31.pdf and in the AA Service Handbook for Great Britain.

Guideline 17, Personal Conduct matters can be found in the AA service Handbook for Great Britain http://www.alcoholics-anonymous.org.uk/members/index.cfm?PageID=98&DocumentTypeID=21 

I think what many don’t yet appreciate is that many newcomers who run into this type of sponsorship and don’t stay in AA, carry a negative message about their bad AA experience to their counsellors, doctors, friends, family. This has resulted in AA being accused of using cult like and bullying methods by some health professionals and this has been reported in national press. The Washington Post article on today’s aacultwatch blog (Fri 22^nd March) about the controversy that is going on in AA is another example of how this fundamentalist neo Oxford Group/ Big Book Study cult is splitting AA and damaging public relations. Maybe if there was more awareness of the harmful effect this cult is having on AA public relations, then more people in AA might be more concerned and then be more actively involved in protecting newcomers and AA itself."

Cheers

The Fellas (Friends of Alcoholics Anonymous)

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